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By Ellie, July 26, 2010 8:18 am

No post today, folks. Today, I’m getting two teeth drilled and filled, and I doubt I’ll have the desire to write anything, even my own novel. So check in Wednesday where I’ll reveal the results of my clothing research. Exciting!

Bwuh. I don’t want to do this…

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By Ellie, February 23, 2010 12:11 pm

I didn’t think a nose could get so flaky and red from all those tissues. Screw you, Kleenex.

What was first believed to be allergies turned out to be a fantastically mind-banging combination of nasal congestion and fatigue. That’s right, folks. I’m sick. While I’m able to move around, hold mundane conversations, and go to my job, my brain just doesn’t want to put any effort into being snarky. Just reading light literature makes my cerebral cortex want to curl up into the fetal position… which would be pretty awesome to see, actually.

So no update today (or midnight on Wednesday mornings, as it really has been). I’ll probably have this thing beat by tomorrow, but if not, you can expect a post no later than Friday night.

Now I gotta get my aching bones out of bed.

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By Ellie, November 30, 2009 7:27 pm

There should have been an article on Friday, but with the Thanksgiving weekend, I didn’t feel like writing on a bloated stomach. On top of that, I had to get up early for Black Friday. No, I didn’t shop. I participated as an unwilling retail lackey.

Sales were actually not as fantastic as my boss thought they would be, and while I didn’t have to tear screaming customers away from each other, I was pretty beat and didn’t feel like writing. I didn’t feel like writing after I got off work on Saturday, either.

As for today, I had two teeth filled, and I feel more like grinding my teeth and taking naps than writing, too.

I know, it seems like I do nothing but make excuses for not posting regularly, but one of these days, I will get into a routine.

Tomorrow: writing lower grade fiction.

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By Ellie, July 10, 2009 1:27 pm

Sometimes, you just want an educational toy with the ability to make people go “aww” and “what the hell” at the same time.

Introducing giant microbe plushes! Made of durable and huggable material, these little guys come in adorable forms such as: brain cell, common cold, E. coli, herpes, mono, penicillin, MRSA (with a Dracula cape), fat cell, flesh eating disease (carries its own dinnerware), the clap, chicken pox (complete with red comb), Lyme disease, HIV, staph, pneumonia, anthrax, and even mad cow disease!

Look at that little dude! He looks so pissed! I wanna buy that little guy so I can cuddle him and scare my husband.

All right, some of you folks might be thinking that this is some pretty weird, and even offensive, crap. But judging from the reviews, plenty of customers like these plushes. They even come with informative cards that detail the illness’s traits or the medicine’s uses.

But I think the product description says it best (and not just because I can’t think of anything else to say about these things):

Most folks never realize how cute microbes can be when expanded 1,000,000 times and then fashioned into cuddly plush. Until now, that is. Keep one on your desktop to remind yourself that there is an “invisible” universe out there filled with very small things that can do incredible damage to much bigger things. Then go and wash your hands. Lather, rinse, repeat.

I’m developing open, weeping sores just thinking about buying one of these guys!