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By Ellie, January 26, 2010 12:39 pm

That was a mostly uneventful trip. But next time, we’re flying. I can’t handle another 13-hour road trip both ways; I’m too old and cranky to sit in a vehicle for that long.

Naturally, no post for this week. Turns out that I was wrong about our return day, which was actually yesterday. We stayed in Florida on Sunday and took advantage of the opportunity to check out Universal Studios and Islands of Adventure. Holy shit, they really went all out for Islands. I could have spent all day there, just snapping pictures of the buildings. (No, not a lot of riding for me. The older I get, the less resistance I have for high-speed coasters. Though the Revenge of the Mummy ride was pretty cool… and I was trapped on the ride once it got started, so I really had no choice but to go through it.)

But getting back to business. There are only so many posts I can make about books and writing, and I know those aren’t nearly as interesting as, say, other things. So I’m going to write about other people’s writing. No, trust, me, this’ll be great! And I won’t be talking about just books, either.

Okay, people 20+ years or older: do you remember the Disney Afternoon? Do you remember all the crazy, cool toons? Do you remember envying Darkwing Duck’s fashion sense donning a purple towel and fedora? I sure do. I also remember the Disney Adventures magazine and all the great comics therein. I’ve spent weeks doing research on said publication and came across these:

And they’re mine, all mine! (Except for the last two issues.) Not only do I plan on embarrassing myself in trying to recapture my childhood, I plan on recapping these comics. Why the hell not? Someone had to write them, and I am trying to keep this as a writing blog.

Next week, I’ll recap Ish #1. And if you like Darkwing, you’re in luck, because these comics are about practically no one else. Goddamn, that’s too much purple. What fun!

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By Ellie, January 19, 2010 11:36 am

Woof. No update yesterday on account of running around the house to get ready for our road trip this Thursday. After 30 years of service, my dad’s retiring from the Coast Guard, and the three of us (Mr. Ellie, Rain the Cat, and myself) are heading down to Florida to congratulate him on finally escaping the federal government. (It is federal, right? I can’t expend the energy to open another tab to Wiki that shit. Oh, don’t look at me like that. I was just a military brat, I didn’t work for the Coast Guard.)

Perhaps my biggest dilemma is choosing which book to take with me. I doubt I’ll have time to read, but I like to be prepared. Now, do I want a book where I’m currently trapped in a long, uninteresting campaign against the Romans to secure land or some other crap I’ve forgotten about (because it’s been months since I last picked up the book), or do I want a book where all the characters are mean, snarky, generally unlikable, and possibly rip-offs from other and better characters?

Or do I just go with the safest option?

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By Ellie, January 12, 2010 12:51 pm

From How Not to Write a Novel by Howard Mittelmark and Sandra Newman (Collins, an imprint of HarperCollinsPublishers, 2008):

It is difficult to render foreign English without falling into unintentional comedy. Some errors, however, can easily be avoided.

Do not have a foreigner address everyone as “Señor” or “Monsieur” despite speaking otherwise perfect English. Do not sprinkle the conversation of a Mexican with the few Spanish words you have picked up along the way. These are generally the same words that the Mexican would have learned in English first, like the words for “yes” and “hello.” [Original emphasis.]

It is also generally a bad idea to try to render foreign accents phonetically. An Italian saying “He’s-a gotta pretty-a daughter-a” may offend some people, but it will convince no one.

[skip skip skip]

No matter how good an ear you have, and how perfectly you’ve captured it, it soon becomes a task to read. The reader is forced to sound out each word, like somebody studying ESL, and will soon grow impatient. Instead, one or two well-placed words sprinkled throughout are enough to flavor the whole thing.

Okay, so it’s not 500 or more, but it’s still a great lesson. And a terrific book. I highly recommend it to writers of all stripes.

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By Ellie, January 12, 2010 12:02 am

Think of the hardest thing to accomplish in writing. This isn’t exactly an objective question; answers will vary from person to person. For some, it’s simply getting something down on paper or in the word processor. For others, it’s characterization, coming up with names or backstory, or even trying to keep every important event in a logical order.

But how often do writers talk about the difficulties of writing dialogue?

I’ve rarely heard complaints about trying to mimic realistic speech or accents. Probably because they figure that if you can listen to people talk, then you’ve already studied the art of dialogue.

Have you ever really listened to a conversation? I mean, really listened to how people draw out their vowels, throw in vocal fillers, or stammer? If I were writing this according to the way I sometimes speak, you’d have a hard time following anything. Occasionally I’ll stammer, switch to another train of thought before returning to the previous one, correct myself in the middle of the sentence, or even stall as I try to come up with a proper word. (Forgetting certain words is one of my common traits.)

And accents. Ugh. I was recently reminded of how atrocious written accents can be while reading Of Mice and Mayhem, a fan-made graphic novel of Chip ‘n Dale’s Rescue Rangers. Don’t get me wrong, the story was fantastic, and I’m envious of the writer/artist’s skills. But Monty’s accent… I literally cringed when I read “Gehdjit” for the first time.

That’s it for this post… What? You expected something insightful and more than 500 words? Fine. Tomorrow–all right, several hours from now when the sun is up–I’ll post an excerpt from one of my favorite writing books. I gots me some playthroughs to watch on YouTube, dammit.

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By Ellie, January 5, 2010 11:12 pm

I’ll write a much longer post next week, I promise. There’s just not a lot going on terms of writing or reading. I took three days off of writing and I’m now trying to get back into the swing of things, averaging about 1K words every day. I’m also debating whether to start reviewing books, draw comics (that attempt again?), and a whole other slew of things.

Because, let’s be honest, it’s kind of boring to just write about writing. It’s like describing how to make a cheese sandwich.